Partially I suppose it was hard because I'm, as previously discussed, in the worst shape of my life. The thing is I think even at my peak of fitness (which doesn't say a lot, believe me,) I'd have found that gruelling. My physio is ex-Army so she knows all about pushing people to their limits but leaving them with enough physical and emotional strength to come back again the next day. She's actually a pretty incredible person. She suffered really badly from PTSD after working in war zones and losing friends and colleagues and seeing them maimed in combat. As if that wasn't challenging enough she then got kicked by a horse and was, in her own words, "broken". She's been in emotional and physical recovery for a long time and didn't know I'd she'd ever be able to return to Army life after everything she's been through. She and my dad have known each other for years. She speaks to me freely about her weight struggles and everything else and it makes hear really easy to work with. I want to work had to please and impress her which is something I've never felt with a trainer of any kind. The trainers I've had have always been either muscle-bound beefcakes or tiny, peppy blonde girls who, while obviously qualified, I never felt comfortable with. I couldn't work with them when I felt they didn't understand me. With my physio feel safe and understood. I'm going to call her Eir here because Eir was the Norse goddess of healing and, for me, that is who she is.
So Eir and I went for a run/walk in the woods and used the equipment the parachute regiment use. For those who don't know these guys are proper hardcore and so is their equipment. I climbed over huge nets and did press-ups on custom logs and pushed myself really fucking hard. I ache. I'm lying in my bed and I ache. But I'm proud of myself. I'm seeing Eir again tomorrow after work and going for another run and we're going to do some cardio and boxing. I'm really excited. I think it's going to hurt but in a great way. I can't wait.
That's all I really have to say today. I ache with fatigue and pride.
Great work! This was really inspiring to read, you might just motivate me to get some exercise done today. Your physio sounds wonderful. I've never felt comfortable with beefcakes or peppy blonde things either; Eir sounds like someone you can really relate to, beyond workouts.
ReplyDeleteGood luck tomorrow! xx